You don’t need another diet. You need a new narrative.

Why is it so hard to do what’s good for us—even when we know better? 

In this episode, Dr. Nashay Lowe sits down with health and wellness coach Jessica Lasisch to unpack the internal conflicts we face on the road to better health. They explore how self-sabotage often masks deeper emotional needs, how negative self-talk undermines progress, and why true transformation starts with mindset—not willpower. You’ll hear powerful insights on the connection between health, emotional healing, and the narratives we carry about our bodies. If you’ve ever felt stuck in the start-stop cycle of your wellness journey, this episode offers a new, compassionate way forward.

Key takeaways

• Life gets in the way of health; it's about capacity, not willpower.
• Cultural differences shape our approach to health and wellness.
• Mental roadblocks like anxiety and stress affect physical health.
• Self-sabotage often stems from the nervous system's protective instincts.
• Negative self-talk is linked to shame and unmet emotional needs.
• Rewriting one's narrative begins with self-awareness and unpacking old beliefs.
• Holistic health involves connecting with body, mind, and soul.
• Small, consistent changes lead to sustainable health improvements.
• Support and safe spaces are crucial for discussing health struggles.
• Health doesn't have to be hard; mindset shifts can make it enjoyable.

Chapters

• 0:00 The Internal Battles of Health
• 2:56 Cultural Perspectives on Health and Wellness
• 5:43 Mental Roadblocks to Health
• 9:16 Rewriting the Narrative
• 12:50 Holistic Approaches to Health
• 16:58 Small Shifts for Big Changes
• 19:21 Letting Go of Limiting Beliefs

Transcript

Dr. Shay: 0:01

Welcome back to The Resolution Room, where we turn tension into transformation through clarity, connection, and consistency. I'm your host, Dr. Nashay Lowe, and this is a space where we explore what's really underneath the moments that challenge us and how they can lead to something more honest, more human, and more whole. So let's get into it. Today's episode is all about the internal battles we face on the path to better health. So I'm joined by health and wellness coach, Jessica Lasisch, who helps people shift their mindset and build habits that stick. So together, we're exploring the intersection of health, self-talk, and internal conflict, things like why it's so hard to do what's good for you, how self-sabotage shows up in disguise, and what it really takes to change from the inside out. So if you've ever felt like your biggest challenge is you, this one's for you. So thank you for coming, Jessica. How are you today?

Jessica Lasisch: 1:15

I'm very good. Thank you for having me.

Dr. Shay: 1:18

Of course. You look lovely.

Jessica Lasisch: 1:20

Thank you. You too.

Dr. Shay: 1:23

Thank you. Thank you. So let's start off by discussing why do we struggle to do what's good for us. So we often know what to do, but still don't do it. And this is incredibly true when it comes to health. I'm sure you know better than anyone. So why do you think that is?

Jessica Lasisch: 1:41

Well, you know, from experience and from what I hear all the time from my clients, it's not that people don't know what's good for them. It's that life gets in the way, right? Most of them, they're juggling just too much work, kids, responsibilities. And by the end of the time, they forget about themselves. And then they're so exhausted. So they care, but They are just so tired and burned out. And before spending time in the kitchen and preparing some healthy food, just quick, quick taking, calling an Uber, Uber Eats. Don't want to promote Uber here, but... And then they're just tired to do the workout and they forget. It's not about their willpower. It's all about the capacity. How much time do you have in a day? What can you fit in?

Dr. Shay: 2:37

Mm-hmm. Okay. And we'll talk a little later on about specific strategies we can use to address that. But I guess let's take it back a second and think about the perspective and how we look at healthcare and just fitness and wellness in general in the United States. So you're actually from Vienna, Austria, correct?

Jessica Lasisch: 2:55

Correct. Yes.

Dr. Shay: 2:57

Awesome. And so I guess from your perspective, now living in the United States, Just as far as perspective goes, how does the way we look and learn about health and wellness in the U.S. versus Europe impact the way we approach it?

Jessica Lasisch: 3:13

Well, you know, I mean, when I think back 10 years ago when I came here to the U.S., you know, I was surprised at how much food is everywhere and how easy you have access. Everything is already packed. is already made and you just open the box and you eat it wherever you are so When I think back, my grandmother brought veggies from her backyard. We picked the fruits from our trees. So it was all home cooking. She baked her own bread. And that was, you know, the way how you grow up, how you learn about food is so, so different than here in America, the American diet. And it's mostly processed, quick opening, something special here in New York City. And we forget about how important it is to nourish our body because if our body gets not nourished very well it also affects our mind

Dr. Shay: 4:16

exactly um and your personal transition how was it hard for you to keep to your diet when you once you got here and saw how accessible everything was

Jessica Lasisch: 4:27

it was not easy and it was really You know, no wonder you don't spend time in your kitchen anymore and prepare food. You just go get something for lunch, bring it in your office. Then at night you go out and of course it changes your body. So first I had really struggled with this American diet and with the lifestyle to adjust from my beautiful Vienna to Coming to New York City, it was challenging. Yeah,

Dr. Shay: 4:59

and in general for yourself during that transition and just thinking about a lot of women's fitness and wellness journeys, what are some of the most common mental roadblocks that you see in people trying to be healthier?

Jessica Lasisch: 5:11

Yeah, I mean, there are a lot and But the common ones is anxiety, not enough sleep, depression, chronic stress, and just always burned out and exhaustion. And I think they're really connected because when you're not sleeping well, then your mood is off. And when you are anxious and constantly stressed, your body holds on the weight, your craving goes up and your stuck in all this cycle and fatigue. And it's not just about eating healthy or moving more. It's about getting the root of what's draining your energy mentally and emotionally.

Dr. Shay: 6:00

Excellent point in balancing what's mentally and emotionally going on versus what your body is physically going through. So how do you distinguish between genuine self-sabotage and just our nervous system trying to keep us comfortable and safe?

Jessica Lasisch: 6:15

Yeah, it's an important point because what we often call self-sabotage, it's actually the nervous system doing its job, right? Its work. Trying to protect us from discomfort, from fear or the overall change. It's not like people feel lazy or unmotivated. So Instead of pushing us always harder, I try to remind and help my clients and to slow down and ask what part of me feels unsafe right now, right? Think about what is it, what makes you feel unsafe? And that's how the shift, you know, the shift comes then in this question and through this work and then change is really happening.

Dr. Shay: 7:10

And going a little deeper on that, what are some signs that someone's internal conflict is actually rooted in shame or unmet emotional needs rather than lack of discipline?

Jessica Lasisch: 7:22

Good question, doctor. Good question. So... One of the biggest thing in the way someone talks about themselves, right? How they talk with their self, with their body is there's always, I'm not good. I'm not enough. I always mess up. So it's negative talk. And that's usually not about discipline. I think it's related to shame. And another sign is when someone keeps setting the same goals over and over and never feels proud or satisfied or never says it's enough. And in most cases, it's not about willpower. It's about emotional needs that were never really met. Maybe they didn't feel supported or safe or when they're growing up in the childhood, but they were constantly criticized so now they're you know they're chasing some health goals not from a place out of love but from a place of needing to prove I'm somebody or needing to prove somebody else

Dr. Shay: 8:38

and so In that sort of next conversation of them building a healthier internal narrative, in your coaching practice, how do you help people rewrite the story that they tell themselves about who they are when it comes to food, fitness, and body image?

Jessica Lasisch: 8:54

Yeah, rewriting the story always starts with self-awareness. Right. Most of my clients, they come to think, oh, I need a new diet. I need a new nutrition. I need a new supplement. I need a different routine. But what they really need is to unlearn the old beliefs they have carried around over and over all these years. Things like I have no discipline. I'm too big. I'm too overweight. I always fail. I'm not fit enough. I'm not healthy. So what I teach them in the coaching sessions is gently start to unpack where those beliefs came from. Is it the comment someone made when you were younger or in your office, a pattern they grow up with? And from there, we build a new identity. On that says, I know how to take care of myself. I can trust my body. I deserve to feel good. That mindset shift is where the real transformation then begins with the clients.

Dr. Shay: 10:05

Yes, that is so powerful. And it kind of makes me think, you know, gosh... not to down anyone else's methods, but of course there's just so many of the quick fixes, the seven day challenges, the 30 day challenges, the five day detox and every, all these things. How do you kind of find your way through all the note or help your client get through all the noise of that and get to the real transformation?

Jessica Lasisch: 10:32

That's a good question. You know, What is always key and what's always working, setting SMART goals. Step by step. Don't push yourself. Don't have negative thoughts. Have fun with playing around new routines. Have fun with implementing new habits in your lifestyle. And be happy and listening to your body because it will tell you when you go in the right direction, your body will feel better, right? If you do something and you punish yourself, then your body will show, make alerts, and then you're not feeling comfortable. So always, always important is, especially with women, connect Connect with your body. Connect with your mind. Connect with your soul. And be kind to yourself.

Dr. Shay: 11:24

And what I love about your approach, it sounds like it's kind of hitting all of the pieces that go into healthcare and fitness. Because I think for a lot of people, like you said earlier, it's kind of just like, I'm going to start a new diet. Or I'm just going to exercise this many times per week. And that's, to them... the solution in itself and not all of the underlying pieces of the mentality and the perspective and the emotional parts of it. So I love that you have like this holistic approach to health and wellness. That's amazing. Do you have a client breakthrough or a personal story that illustrates how powerful internal reframing can be in health transformation?

Jessica Lasisch: 12:08

Yeah. So there was... A powerful woman, businesswoman, she still has an amazing high-level position, is always on the go, super successful. That's okay.

Dr. Shay: 12:25

You don't have to talk about me. It's okay.

Jessica Lasisch: 12:27

Go ahead. I'm sorry. But she always said to herself, she was one of the bigger girls, and then she doesn't feel so good sometimes. I mean, she was this power woman and comes to me But she said, why I'm so successful in my business, but why my body is not doing what I want? Why I cannot be successful with my weight loss program? So what we did, you know, like I said before, smart goals, we really adjust every week. We took bad habits out. We put good habits in. But every week, step by step, we build a holistic health, nutrition, wellness plan for my body. for her what fits in her busy lifestyle as a businesswoman and nothing extreme really small steps and most importantly we worked on her mindset right shifting the story from i'm stuck in my body and and let's say my body deserved this i'm i'm not stressed and i love my shape so after we did more also mental mindset shift suddenly her body starts losing losing weight and she felt more comfortable and more grounded and uh because she was not stressing herself so much she was finally working with her body as well

Dr. Shay: 13:55

i love that um and so you started touching on this so can you talk a little bit more about sort of the small shifts that have the biggest impact when someone's kind of stuck in this whole like start stop start stop cycle

Jessica Lasisch: 14:09

yeah yeah So I try to always remind them and bring them back to small steps because they want to go too much and too fast and everything needs to happen right away. But that's not going to work. It's not then consistent. So think something like learning or explaining to them Have a healthy, nourishing breakfast. And when you don't have time, make yourself a smoothie. Don't grab on the way in a coffee store this unhealthy croissant or the donuts or whatever. It's all sugar processed. So building a non-negotiable routine, for an example, the night before breakfast, Get a nice, beautiful lunchbox and prepare some salad in there, what you can bring in your office. That's something what it helps. But the biggest shift is how to talk to yourself. Now we are back to this. and how to talk to yourself when things don't go so perfectly. That's where most people then quit and the negative self-talk. So I try to help clients practice grace and get back on track without any shame or guilt. And that's when things really start to change, not from the perfection, it's from the progress they make.

Dr. Shay: 15:37

And just given all of your experience, what would you say to someone who feels like they're just constantly failing in their health journey?

Jessica Lasisch: 15:46

Well, first, I would say you are not failing. You're probably caring more than anyone else, and they probably feel stuck, and there is maybe much more behind. It's not about the food or the workout. It's They're usually something deeper going. They're maybe stressed or past trauma or even just never having support or feeling safe to talk about what's really going on with them. And so I feel like when someone always fails and they come back once a week or every two weeks and they're still, oh, I only did my workout once or I only did this, I'm not good enough. then I realize I have to dig a little bit deeper because there is way much physically, psychology behind that, right? But it's be always positive and motivation and give them the support and the feeling that's a safe space so they can open up and talk.

Dr. Shay: 16:59

Perfect. And building on that... What's one belief about health or healing that you wish more people would let go of?

Jessica Lasisch: 17:08

Yeah, I like this question. I feel like clients say, oh, it's so hard to be healthy. It's so hard to stay healthy. It's so hard doing this and doing this. And that's what I said. It doesn't need to be hard. Just don't say this. Don't keep saying it. You need to have fun. And when you shift your mindset and you tune in in your body, and then it's not, oh, I'm going in the gym to burn all these calorins because I had a pizza last night. and now I need to go in the gym. No, now because when you shift your mindset, you go in the gym and you are happy, you're excited to go in the gym because then afterwards, this one hour, you feel fit, you're strong, you have a good energy. And then when you know and learn what you really need to eat and macronutrients, what fills your body to stay healthy, then it's not like this punishment and this wrong beliefs that they think Being healthy or losing weight, it's a punishment. It's so hard to do this.

Dr. Shay: 18:15

Well, Jessica, thank you so much for your insightful conversation. Please tell the people where to find you and learn more about your work and how to connect with you.

Jessica Lasisch: 18:28

Yes, I'm based in New York City, but you can find me and reach out through my website. It's my first name, Jessica, and my last name, Lasisch, so jessicalasisch.com. And I hope that was helpful for many, many people who are listening today. And Dr. Shay, very, very grateful for the conversation with you. Thank you so much for having me today. Of

Dr. Shay: 18:53

course. As always, thank you for joining me today in the Resolution Room. I'm grateful you're here doing this work alongside me. If this episode spoke to you, I'd love for you to please share. And until next time, keep building in the quiet because that's what will carry you forward.